Keeping the Fire Alive and Well in Your Marriage

Marriage is the commitment and promise to spend the rest of your lives together - but that doesn’t mean that marriage doesn’t change your relationship dynamic over time. Over time, it’s easy for the "fire" in your marriage, that passion which brought you two together, to begin to waver and decline. When that fire goes out, it can lead to a marriage without love or passion; and that type of marriage is typically not long for the world. That is why it’s so important to keep the fire alive and well in your marriage; and, thankfully, it’s not all that difficult to keep your marriage passionate once you know the right steps. The following are some essential tips that will keep your marriage just as passionate, fiery and loving as it was on Day 1 of the honeymoon.

Don’t let your sex life become stagnate

As a married couple, you should not let your sex life become stagnate, dull and boring. This doesn’t mean you need to go off the walls with experimenting in the bedroom, but be open to new experiences such as new positions, new elements (music, mood lighting, etc.) as well as being open to exploring each other's fantasies. Make sure that you communicate with your spouse about what they might like changed in the bedroom so that you are both on the same page when you start working to keep the fire and passion in your bedroom alive.  Trying new things together can be a fun way to keep things exciting, but remember that consistency is also important.  There's nothing wrong with having intimacy goals and keeping track of those goals to make sure you're keeping your relationship a priority.   

Don’t be afraid to do something spontaneous

Passion and fire are sometimes difficult to be stoked by your routine activities alone: you need to get spontaneous! To keep that passion alive in your marriage, start working on spontaneous ways to surprise and love your spouse. This can be something elaborate like scheduling a mini romantic weekend vacation or even something simple like surprising your spouse with a delicious, fancy dinner (complete with wine, tablecloth and candlesticks) waiting when they get home.

Compliment your spouse on a physical and emotional level

You need to compliment your spouse on multiple levels if you want to keep that fire between you alive. It’s important that these compliments aren’t just physical or just emotional: it needs to be both if you want to truly keep your spouse’s passion flame. Complimenting them on a physical level meets their physical and sexual needs, whereas complimenting your spouse on an emotional level strengthens that deep, loving bond you have together.

Embrace physical intimacy

Passion isn’t just about physical intimacy, of course: but it definitely plays a key role in keeping the fire in your marriage burning bright. Physical intimacy is more than sex. It includes everything from holding your spouse’s hand while you walk down the street to cuddling in bed at home to more spicy intimacy such as giving your spouse as squeeze when you walk by them in the living room. Physical intimacy can help you and your spouse connect even if you’re not in the bedroom.  If you have kids - where it's appropriate let them see their parents in love!

Keeping the fire and passion in your marriage alive is important, so don’t forget to start implementing the above tips into your relationship.