Domestic violence is one of the most common contributors to divorce. If there is domestic violence in your married relationship, it is important that you know how to handle the situation. The following guide will help you understand more about how domestic violence impacts relationships and what you should do if there is domestic violence in your married relationship.
How Domestic Violence Impacts Your Relationship
Domestic violence can impact your marriage in many different ways. When one spouse hits another, it is not only an act of physical violence but an act of emotional violence as well. Someone who hits their spouse is effectively violating their marriage vows and causing emotional and physical damage that will hurt their trust and love in their spouse.
Over time, domestic violence will cause irreparable damage which is why it's a common contributor to divorce. A spouse who is the subject of domestic violence will want to leave the relationship so that they can pursue a life without fear of domestic violence.
Sometimes the abuse is directed towards the other spouse, but domestic violence can also be directed toward children, parents or anyone else living in the same area.
How to Handle Domestic Violence in Your Married Relationship
Domestic violence in a marriage is a delicate situation. In order to properly manage the situation, you will need to follow two key steps.
Assess the Situation
The first thing you need to do is assess the situation. If you are the spouse who is on the receiving end of domestic violence, you need to ask yourself: how serious is the domestic violence? How long has it been going on? Do I think my spouse can recover from this behavior? And if you are the spouse who is committing the domestic violence, you need to ask yourself: Why am I committing this behavior? Can I commit to changing my ways? Where can I get the help I need?
If you are the victim of domestic violence and you fear for your health and safety, you need to consider leaving the relationship and finding somewhere safe; if you have children, take them with you and work with a lawyer to learn about out your options. However, if you feel that the domestic violence is something that you and your partner can genuinely work on - such as domestic violence caused by your partner’s anger problems that they are in therapy working to correct - then it is possible to work on the problem.
However, it’s important to recognize that many victims of domestic violence don’t see the situation as "serious" until it is too late - this type of assessment should be done with a professional therapist who can provide a third party opinion.
Consider Therapy, Rehab, Anger Management and other Professional Solutions
If you believe that you can work through the domestic violence, then you should consider solutions such as anger management for the spouse committing the abuse, therapy for both individuals and as a couple, professional rehab if the violence is caused by addiction, and other professional solutions.
Remember, if you are a victim of domestic violence and need help, you do not have to stay in the relationship. Working on domestic violence problems should be considered on a case-by-case basis.
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